(?) (crazymaxwell) wrote in free_catharsis,

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The Real World Is Vile

There are many things that are stupid in this world. A lot of them are television shows, a lot of which are on MTV, and a lot of which begin with "The," end with "Real World," and rhyme with "The Real World." Watching the Real World is great. This show was apparently designed by MTV executives crowded together in a smoke-filled room with the sole purpose of pissing me off in mind, and it's working really well. The Real World is even more irritating than Counterstrike fans.

It's apparently supposed to be a microcosm of the Real World. Apparently, the Real World consists of three groups of people, which are ugly people, stupid people, and ugly stupid people. Those three groups of people only partake in three basic activities, which are yelling, having sex, getting drunk, and five more complex activities, which are yelling while drunk, yelling while having sex, having sex while drunk, yelling about having sex, and, by far the most complex, yelling about having sex while drunk.

So where does MTV find these people, you might ask? Probably in the crowds that gather in front of Total Request Live. There's plenty of stupid to go around among those crowds, given the tremendous drawing power bad music has on idiots. Watching TRL on TV is bad enough to lower your IQ twenty points for a few days, but seeing it in person can cause permanent brain damage, especially if you're there willingly.

MTV only plays bad music, just like the radio. I hate the radio almost as much as I hate MTV. You can't turn it on without hearing Christina Aguilera's most recent desperate cry for attention, Good Charlotte pretending to be anarchists or whatever's 'in' now, or Evanescence's Amy Lee crying about how her million dollars beat her up and cheated on her. Not only is it bad music, but it's bad music with occasional advertising breaks. I should place advertising breaks in the middle of my writings. And so, in closing, here's a word from our sponsors.

Do you wish you were cool? Do you wish you had friends? Well, you won't be either of those things until you buy a cordless jellyfish tickler. Cordless jellyfish ticklers, made with the finest materials, are cordless, and they tickle jellyfish. Buy one. Now.

Cross-posted to my journal.
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